Proof of God

by Myra King


I always wanted proof of God
even as a child
I remember my mother's eyes as I hid a note
in the dry dirt of our backyard
written words - mine - asking God to take the paper
if you are really there
my mother told me God does not work like that
you should not question
her eyes squinted the sun and me in turn
a look as if someone she was unsure of wanting
could not share her belief
years later at her graveside with my final proof of if or not
I recall her long last months
cruel duality of cancer and dementia
when she was only enough of herself
to pray in little girl voice every day
for Jesus to take her
she was ready now ready for this to end
her eyes squinted me that look
now a shared betrayal to her faith 
that she still half clung to
even like a child


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Myra King lives on Worlds End Highway in South Australia with her rescue greyhound, Sparky. Her poems and short stories, many of which have won awards, have been published in print and online, in literary magazines, anthologies and papers including Puncher &Wattmann, October Hill NY, Islet, Boston Literary Magazine, Rochford Street Review, EDF, Heron's Nest and San Pedro River Review. She has won the UK Global, the US Moon Prize and been shortlisted for the US Glass Woman Prize and the Scarlett Stiletto SINC Sisters In Crime AUS. http://myrakingprofile.webs.com/