The Trouble With Happiness

by Laurie Kuntz


In Hawaii, on a family vacation,
on one of those days
we let you eat anything you wanted,
and then drove to “Mustard’s Last Stand”
serving 47 varieties of hot dogs.

On a day when

the waves were calm enough
and I wasn’t worried, and let you go
further out than I ever have,
and the sun block did not sting your eyes,
and the rented car had a radio station
that played 60’s songs without commercials,
and the DJ repeated the titles after each song,
and we ate french fries at three different rest stops,

knowing that this could be enough, forever—

but, for no reason, you started to cry,
then whispered, I’m just so happy.

At six, you knew
                                all this would become a shadowed memory
retold by three different people,

and I would argue with dad whether the hot dog stand
really had 47 varieties, and whether
the DJ played commercials between the rock and roll,

(which, too, we’d argue over).
                                                 Every detail now askew,

You knew then,

On one of those days,

these infinite moments of our lives,
held in the pockets of your tears,

would never last.


* * * * *

Laurie Kuntz is a widely published and an award winning poet. She’s been nominated for a Pushcart and Best of the Net prize. She’s published two poetry collections (The Moon Over My Mother’s House, Finishing Line Press, Somewhere in the Telling, Mellen Press), and two chapbooks (Simple Gestures, Texas Review, Women at the Onsen, Blue Light Press). Her new chapbook, Talking Me off the Roof, is forthcoming from Kelsay Press in 2022. Recently retired, she lives in an endless summer state of mind. Visit her at: https://lauriekuntz.myportfolio.com › home-1