How I Learned to Cook

by Susan Tepper

Ingredients:

1 cup long hair

tsp of tea (British blend)

3 generous strips silk ribbon

Wire whisk

Cloves

Saucepan

Sifter

2 eggs

White candles

Fresh lemon

Salt and pepper to taste

                                    *

Set the table in advance using a nice cloth.  

Put out your best white candles. 

Blanch cloves in a saucepan on slow heat.  

Drain the cloves. 

Take a bath in scented clove water then shower for double cleanliness.

Rinse your hair with the fresh squeezed lemon. 

Towel dry. 

Slice off enough hair to fill a porcelain cup

add a teaspoon of tea

and place on the dresser to cool.  

Wind strips of silk ribbon around yourself fashionably. 

Salt and pepper to taste. 

Sift the loneliness. 

Using the wire whisk, beat the adultery with 2 eggs. 

* * * * *

More about Susan Tepper and her widely published work can be found at www.susantepper.com.